Report 1 | Report 2

'MORE POINTS FOR CRAYOLA...!'

More points for crayola…..but even more for the Cheeky ladies! Crayola went into the game scraping the bottom of the barrel to find players and eventually found a squad of exactly 15. Let's hope for no injuries then.
The game started okay with the Cheeky Ladies, as with all the other teams Crayola have played against, putting a fair few points on the board within the first 10 minutes. However, Crayola fought on and Captain Mark Holmes scored a drop kick from out of the blue. 3 points to Crayola…30 odd to the Cheeky Ladies. The Ladies were well organised and strong in their pink and white shirts, but surging runs from Jorin Grimsdale and Matthew Kidd showed them that Crayola weren't push overs………up until the point that 'Tank' got the ball. The man Tank deserved his name as well and on a number of occasions broke through the Crayola front and back lines, cheered on by boisterous shouts of 'go on tank' and 'kill em ya bastard'.
Half time came and the weary lads walked in, drank some water and then walked back out onto a referee less pitch. Far up yonder we could see the 'Agrics' ref had done a runner with the whistle and the watch! Oh dear…."We've got a ref here" came the shout from Captain Mark and after conference with the Ladies who are Cheeky, it was decided that Andrew Storey, RFU referee ID number 23926, would adjudicate the remaining half. Oh and what a half it was!
It started with a faint whistle from the mouth of the ref and Mark got it under way. Tank immediately got the ball, put his head on the ground and scythed a way through the Crayola line. More points were put on the board for the Ladies and Crayola started to look weary. Spuggy was still trying to get to grips with the 'complicated' Crayola line out calls and was 'not used to throwing it that low'. Dave Baldwin went off with chest pains after being winded in the first half and so with great sportsmanship the Cheeky Ladies lost one of their men too. The game flowed on with the referee turning a blind eye to many infringements including a 'none intentional knock on' and letting both teams have the 'advantage'.
Then came the crowning glory of the game. The Cheeky Ladies tries were good, but not as good as this one! The Ladies had the ball and in the middle of a flowing movement across their front line, Captain Mark shot from nowhere with the ball and ran the length of the field followed by the jubilant referee jumping up and down. Game set and match as far as Crayola were concerned. The referee cut the game short by about half an hour and left it at that! Crayola 10, Cheeky ladies 58. Good stuff.

Andrew Storey

'CRAYOLA SCORE AGAIN BUT STRUGGLE AGAINST LADIES'

Crayola RFC took a depleted squad to Close House to do battle with the Cheeky Ladies on wednesday. They arrived full of optomism and ready for a good game. However, things started to go wrong for the Crayola boys when a referee failed to turn up, and then the one that covered for him turned out to be the rather disliked one from the Agrics game, however this time with a whistle!

The referee then preceeded to give decision after decision against Crayola, the worst of which being the Ladies first try which shot straight back out of Crayola's scrum for the Ladies scrum-half to pick up the ball and pretty much fall over the line, to Crayola's disbelief. A stunning looking, but rather lucky, 30 metre drop-goal from stand-in fly half Mark Holmes made the score 5-3 but the Ladies, assisted by the referee, preceeded to take a strangle hold on the game, and were leading at half-time by 30-odd to 3.

The second half saw a change of referee. Good, you may have thought...think again, as Crayola star Andy Storey took a whistle and watch for the first time, after only playing rugby this season. His outlook on the rules were unorthadox to say the least. The best of which was the 'Unintentional Knock-on' by the Ladies scrum-half. Anyway, the second half continued pretty much like the first, with the howling gale-force wind, and the mountainous uphill slope that can be seen on Close House 1, hampering Crayola's attacking.

The score had rolled on to 55-3, when that man again, the masterful Mark Holmes intercepted a pass from the Ladies fly-half and sprinted like a cheetah the 70 metres up that slope, persued by a Cheeky Lady, and planted the ball between the Ladies posts. The rest of the Crayola team, not happy with their fly-half's exploits ran upfield to do the 'Hand Grenade' celebration. However, they arrived to find their skipper lying flat on the floor exhausted after his run! Holmes converted and for the second week running Crayola had scored double figures.

The final score was Crayola 10 Cheeky Ladies 60, and the gimp suit went to the ever-reliable Spuggy, who not only completely cocked-up the only line-out move we have, but also tried to chip the ball over an oncoming Lady, only for it to land in his arms and then run upfield and score.

Mark Holmes